How writers can learn to accept criticism

May 14, 2012

Sarah Elaine Eaton, speaker, presenter, keynote, technology, social media, Calgary, Canada, educator, education, professional developmentI teach a graduate level writing course for students enrolled in the Master’s of Education program at the University of Calgary. My students are from all over the world and are actively involved in the teaching profession. The objective of this course is to prepare them for professional writing as educators and scholarly academic writing. Their major assignment involves preparing a manuscript for submission to a reputable journal in the profession.

Some students have said that they cringe at the thought of their writing being rejected by an editor or criticized by a teacher. Most have never submitted a manuscript to a journal, with fear of criticism or rejection being a contributing factor. These tips are intended help novice writers learn to take criticism from instructors, peer reviewers and editors.

Start with the assumption that your work can be improved

The biggest mistake writers make is assuming that once they have submitted a piece of writing, that is finished… and perfect. This assumption sets the writer up for a frustration and anger when their work is returned with a request for revisions. Falling in love with your own writing is a dangerous thing.

It can be helpful to approach your writing from the point of view that a perfect piece of writing never (or at least only very rarely) exists. Assume that there is always room for improvement.

Expect rejection

There are many stories of famous writers whose work was rejected. Even great writers get multiple rejections. J.K. Rowling had Harry Potter rejected a dozen times, according to some reports.  Rather than assuming that your work will be accepted or accepted with minor revisions, instead expect that you will be rejected, not once, but numerous times. This will position you to be tenacious and resilient. Here’s a list of 50 iconic writers whose work was repeatedly rejected. Personally, I’d count myself lucky to ever be included on such a list.

Develop a thick skin

Some writers develop such a deep emotional attachment to their work that it can be unhealthy, or even destructive. It is healthy and productive to develop your writing until you are satisfied and proud of it. You have passed the point of healthy emotions when you are so fragile when anything but glowing praise leaves you feeling all crumpled up and hateful towards anyone who has offered you feedback.

I tell my students to think of TV shows such as Iron Chef. The chefs who make it to the top of their profession are deeply proud of their accomplishments, but they can also take criticism. They have a thick skin. Be your own version of an “Iron Writer”.

Learn the difference between criticism and cruelty

It is true that some editors are just plain mean. However, the majority are not cruel. They may be straightforward and clinical, but do not mistake this for cruelty. Your editor is not paid to be your friend. Sometimes they are not paid at all, particularly if they are editing an academic journal.

An editor’s job is to help ensure that the final written work adheres to an established set of guidelines and standards. If your work doesn’t meet a minimum set of standards, they have to tell you. That’s their job.

If you submit enough manuscripts to enough editors, chances are that you will eventually run into a jerk or two. When that happens, take whatever feedback you find helpful and disregard the rest.

In general though, editors are generally a clear headed and insightful bunch. Many really do want to help. Most love writing and words as much as you do, maybe even more. The truth is though, they see so much crap and poorly written material that sometimes, they  just get exasperated. They are human, too. So, they may learn to be unemotional or clinical in their responses. Do not mistake an editor’s lack of bubbly enthusiasm as a personal vengeance against you.

Accept the challenge of improving your work

Let’s use the analogy of TV chefs again. But this time, think of a cooking show such as Top Chef, where chefs have to compete for the title of “Top Chef”. One by one, chefs are eliminated. Those who reach the finale all have two things in common. First, their end creation is superb. Second, when they are given advice and criticisms by their judges, their attitude is “Bring it on!” They not only accept the judges’ criticism, they embrace the challenge of improving their work.

Focus first on creating stellar writing. Second, when you are faced with an editor or peer reviewer who challenges you to improve on your masterpiece, smile sincerely and say, “I’m here to bring my A-game… So bring on the feedback!” Take your editors or reviewers’ comments the same way a Top Chef takes criticism from a judge.

Be humble and gracious

Say thank you to your editor or reviewer. Chances are very high that your editor has just as much, if not more, experience in publishing as you do. He or she has likely experienced everything that you are experiencing yourself, including rejection. Editors vary in their tone, style and personality. You may be offended by an editor’s straight forward approach to your work.

An editor does not have the same emotional attachment to the work that you do; and nor should they. Their priorities include getting the publication out on time, and possibly working with an entire editorial or production team. By recognizing that your editor has more on his or her plate than your manuscript and and by being gracious, you are likely to build a better professional relationship. Trust me, it always pays to be on the good side of your editor.

Keep a lid on your anger

It is normal to feel angry when we are rejected. What is not OK is to take your anger out on your editor, your peer reviewer or your professor. Even if you believe your editor’s comments come across as cruel or unjustified, they may not have been intended that way. Besides, what you can not control is what others say or how they say it. What you can control is your own professional conduct. Never, ever send an e-mail when you are angry.

Here’s a trick I learned: If you need to write an angry letter to “get it all out”, the trick is not to put the recipient’s address in the “To” section of the e-mail. Instead, put your own address. Send yourself the e-mail first. Let it sit in your inbox for a minimum of 24 hours. Then, read it again. If you still feel angry. Leave it in your inbox for another  24 hours. Do not send it to the intended recipient until you can read it over yourself and not be flooded with the same feelings of rage. It is likely that you will revise and soften the language of your message when you do.

Don’t be a diva

Do not fight with your editor or go all “diva” on them. That means, do not tell them how wrong they are or how sorry they’ll be that they didn’t publish your precious manuscript. Seriously, nothing comes across as more arrogant or disdainful. The bottom line is, if your work really is that good, it will speak for itself… eventually.

Be patient and resilient

Writing is a process. It takes time. Revising and rewriting are part of that process. Mozart may have popped out masterpieces without revising them, but few musicians or writers can lay claim to such genius. Be patient with your editors and with yourself. Learn the subtle balancing act of having simultaneous confidence in your work and humility in yourself. Most editors, peer reviewers and instructors have benevolent intentions. They are not monsters set to duel to the death with your ego. When you see these people as your allies instead of your enemies, the writing process becomes easier. As they say… every rejection gets you one step closer to a “yes”. Patience is part of the process.

Resources related to this post:

How to Take Writing Criticism Gracefully – by Hannah Rice Myers, eHow

How (and Why) to Take Criticism – by Monique van den Berg

Developing a Thick Skin: How to Accept Criticism – by Betty L. Meeshack

How to Happily Accept Criticism – by Angus Shaw

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Update – January 2018 – This blog has had over 1.8 million views thanks to readers like you. If you enjoyed this post, please “like” it or share it on social media. Thanks!

Sarah Elaine Eaton is a faculty member in the Werklund School of Education, University of Calgary, Canada.


Free, online resources for learning Romanian

May 13, 2012

Sarah Eaton, blog, Sarah Elaine EatonIf you’re looking to learn Romanian, here are some free, downloadable resources that may be helpful:

Romanian Reference Grammar (1989) – by Christina N. Hoffman, published by the U.S. Department of State Foreign Service Institute. – This guide is 109 pages and is written in English. Great resource for native English speakers wanting to learn Romanian. Available from: http://fsi-language-courses.org/Courses/Romanian/FSI%20-%20Romanian%20Reference%20Grammar%20-%20Student%20Text.pdf

Romanian Grammar – (n.d.) – Unknown author. – This is a highly detailed and technical grammar manual, spanning 183 pages. Available from: http://www.seelrc.org:8080/grammar/pdf/stand_alone_romanian.pdf

Forvo – Romanian – Online site to help with pronunciation. See: http://www.forvo.com/languages/ro/

Quizlet – A site to make your own flash cards in Romanian. See: http://quizlet.com/5937063/romanian-phrases-flash-cards/#

Note: These resources were originally shared by Paul Widergren on the FLTEACH listserv.

Do you know of other free online resources to learn Romanian? If so, please leave a comment.

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Update – January 2018 – This blog has had over 1.8 million views thanks to readers like you. If you enjoyed this post, please “like” it or share it on social media. Thanks!

Sarah Elaine Eaton is a faculty member in the Werklund School of Education, University of Calgary, Canada.


Today’s free webinar on marketing literacy and language schools: Relationship Marketing

May 9, 2012

Today we’re having the eighth in a series of ten free webinars on how to market and promote literacy programs and language schools.

Each webinar highlight different ideas from 101 Ways to Market Your Language Program. Every week you get practical, low-cost ideas to help you promote your program. Best of all, you’ll get to connect with others on line who are also interested in the same topic, ask questions and interact.

The webinars are  30 to 60 minutes in length. Bring a pen and paper. I’m going to give you lots of ideas you can implement right away.

Webinar #8 of 10 – What to expect

Today’s webinar will focus on:

  • Relationship marketing.
  • Building trust.
  • Personal touches that make a huge difference.
  • The real “secret” to marketing.

Webinar time

Date: Wednesday, May 2, 2012

There are some time zone changes coming up around the world, so double-check these times against your local area:

Point of origin – 14:00 (2:00 p.m.) Mountain Time, March 21, 2012 – Calgary / Edmonton

16:00 (4:00 p.m.) – Eastern Time – Toronto / New York

20:00 (8:00 p.m.) – Greenwich Time – London, England

22:00 (10:00 p.m.) – Eastern European Time – Athens / Istanbul

05:00 (5:00 a.m.) – following day – Japan Standard Time – Tokyo

How to log in

There is no need to register. These webinars are free and open to everyone. Seating is limited though, so sign on early.

To join the webinar, simply click here: http://meet11548754.adobeconnect.com/saraheaton/

Will it be recorded?

You bet. I’ll record the program and post it within 24 hours or so. No charges or fees to watch these recorded programs.

What will future webinars cover?

Here’s what we’ll cover in upcoming webinars:

  • Week #9 – Effective follow up with your marketing and not giving up too soon.
  • Week #10 – Social media for marketing.

All you have to do is block off Wednesdays in your calendar at your corresponding local time and then log in using the link above.

If you can’t make the webinar, and you’d like to ask a question about the topic, feel free to leave me a comment. I’ll do my best to answer questions that come in before the program during the webinar. You can watch the recording to get the answer to your question, or I’ll answer you back in the comment section.

Related post:

101 Ways to Market Your Language Program (10 Free webinars) http://wp.me/pNAh3-1j6

Recordings of past programs:

#1 Webinar recording: 101 Ways to Market Your Language and Literacy Program 

#2 Webinar recording: 101 Ways to Market Your Language and Literacy Program

#3 Webinar recording: 101 Ways to Market Your Language and Literacy Program

#4 Webinar recording: 101 Ways to Market Your Language and Literacy Program

#5 Webinar recording: 101 Ways to Market Your Language and Literacy Program

#6 Webinar recording: 101 Ways to Market Your Language and Literacy Program

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Update – January 2018 – This blog has had over 1.8 million views thanks to readers like you. If you enjoyed this post, please “like” it or share it on social media. Thanks!

Sarah Elaine Eaton is a faculty member in the Werklund School of Education, University of Calgary, Canada.


10 Ideas for Non-Profit Facebook Posts

May 7, 2012

I’ve been working with a non-profit literacy group in Calgary who really wants to increase their Facebook and Twitter presence. The group asked me today, “What kinds of things can we post on our Facebook page?” Well, folks, this one’s for you.

  1. A group photo of your staff.
  2. A photo of the building where you are located.
  3. A photo of the materials you use in your program.
  4. A link to an online article about your areas of expertise (Example: early childhood literacy).
  5. A link to an upcoming event or program.
  6. A link to an interesting and relevant online newspaper article.
  7. Links to resources in your field.
  8. Call for papers for an upcoming conference in your field.
  9. Links to other community events related to your work. (Your colleagues will thank you for this!)
  10. A link to your website that showcases a success story of someone who benefited from your programs.

This list is just a beginning. The important thing to to post on a fairly consistent basis, so your online supporters can connect with you on a regular basis.

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Update – January 2018 – This blog has had over 1.8 million views thanks to readers like you. If you enjoyed this post, please “like” it or share it on social media. Thanks!

Sarah Elaine Eaton is a faculty member in the Werklund School of Education, University of Calgary, Canada.


Webinar recording: 101 Ways to Market Your Language and Literacy Program (#7)

May 3, 2012

In the seventh of ten webinars today on how to market your language or literacy program we focussed on the power of connections. We talked about

  • Your circles of influence
  • How to showcase your school as a centre of expertise and excellence
  • The importance of partnerships and how to develop them.

Here’s the recording of Webinar #7:

Please “like” the YouTube video if you find these recordings helpful!

Join us next week for Class #8. It will focus on relationship marketing and the power of connecting in an emotionally positive manner. Get more details here.

Related posts:

101 Ways to Market Your Language Program (10 Free webinars) – Program overview and login instructions

#1 Webinar recording: 101 Ways to Market Your Language and Literacy Program 

#2 Webinar recording: 101 Ways to Market Your Language and Literacy Program

#3 Webinar recording: 101 Ways to Market Your Language and Literacy Program

#4 Webinar recording: 101 Ways to Market Your Language and Literacy Program

#5 Webinar recording: 101 Ways to Market Your Language and Literacy Program

#6 Webinar recording: 101 Ways to Market Your Language and Literacy Program

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Share or Tweet this post: Webinar recording is up! Tips for Marketing Your Language and Literacy Program (#7) http://wp.me/pNAh3-1o5

Update – January 2018 – This blog has had over 1.8 million views thanks to readers like you. If you enjoyed this post, please “like” it or share it on social media. Thanks!

Sarah Elaine Eaton is a faculty member in the Werklund School of Education, University of Calgary, Canada.